this is my story, this is my song

i'm linking up today to Lysa TerKeurst's Blog & this post:

two years ago, i heard about a conference. the Proverbs 31 Ministries "She Speaks Conference". several of the bloggers that i follow daily were going. while they were there, they posted photos & when they returned back home, they blogged about it. it sounded like a great conference & a little seed of a dream was planted within me. hmmmh. maybe i could go in 2009.

well, you know how it goes.

life sometimes gets in the way of little dreams. we lead the usual active lives. we're involved in a lot of ministries, we have a large family, we watch our grandchildren during the day & we have a lot of health issues.

during the year, i kept talking about the conference with shelly, my husband. he kept encouraging me to do it(probably just so he could get some alone time for himself, hah!). the cost was a major factor. we usually like to spend our money on other people, not ourselves. but, shelly thought i should go & do the "She Speaks" track but i wasn't so sure. heaven knows i'm not a very good public speaker(but i do it when God says to do it) but i really felt that i should do the "she leads" sessions. well, by the time i got around to going online to register in 09, i found that registration was closed. at first, i thought i hadn't been obedient in listening to the Holy Spirit's leading & as a result, didn't move fast enough & would miss out. but now i know that the timing wasn't right.

i love God's perfect timing. i pray for sensitivity to His timing. i always pray that i won't go ahead of God but will wait for Him. of course, too often than not, i plow on ahead so full of myself. but He is so patient with me. giving me opportunity after opportunity to wait for him. (click here to read a story about what happens when you wait on God)

he gives me so many great opportunities to serve him, as well. i've always had a passion for women's ministry & in serving the Lord through serving His women.

but, in 2001, i found myself in an odd place. i had just gone through a battle with breast cancer. the Lord had given me a single verse from His Word for the battle: Exodus 16:4 “I will rain down bread from heaven” each & every day, i asked the Lord to give me what was needed for just that day. (like the israelites, i would be tested. would i trust & obey when my very life was at stake?) so i started with a lumpectomy, followed by just 3 rounds of chemo that had to be stopped because it was killing me. the chemo was followed by a radical mastectomy (without reconstructive surgery). & i was found to be cancer free! praise the Lord, He had surely healed me. the tumor had been small but very aggressive & the 3 rounds of chemo were not enough to get rid of it but only to shrink it & i was supposed to start radiation after the mastectomy. but now it wasn't needed. i was healed. i no longer had a breast, but i was healed. i will forever sing of the mighty healing power of our Lord Jesus Christ! i only asked him to give me what i needed for each day but He is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us (Ephesians 3:20).

but that's not the end of the story. the chemo had been so strong that it wrecked havoc on my already weakened immune system(from a condition that i've had for a very long time). i started getting infection after infection, shingles, pleurisy, & even a strep infection in my chest muscles. i had an allergic reaction to quinine (from malaria tablets i took for a work & witness trip) & my skin peeled from head to toe, again & again, for weeks on end. the chemo had caused memory loss & i had trouble with concentration & i was sent straight into menopause. i started having anxiety attacks. i started questioning the Lord. why did He heal me & then send me into this? was the struggle with cancer so much worse? why was this happening?
and i began to have this restless feeling in my spirit. the Holy Spirit started speaking to me of God's great love. His healing of me wasn't intended to be the end of the story but the beginning of an even closer walk with Him. i would need to lean on Him more & more, not less. i must still pray that He will provide me with what i need for each day & be thankful for what he has given me & continues to give.

during this difficult time in 2001, he gave me a beautiful gift: an unquenchable thirst for His Word. i had always been such a "martha", always doing the needed & necessary tasks. now, He was calling me to sit at His feet & learn. I think Matthew 4:4 is the perfect follow-up after Exodus 16:4. we go from God giving me manna from heaven, which was just what I needed for each day to what Jesus says here. "it is written: man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God." the humor of it does not fail to escape me. here i was, couldn't remember even my name somedays, & God calls me to His Word to remember it & live on it!

this led me to praying & studying His Word with just 1 friend (bless you Holly Welty!) & then 2(i love you Michele Abraham) & then there were 4 of us. for 2 yrs. we studied & prayed & out of that, an interdenominational Bible Study was started that now has over 100 women & over 60 children, with Holly Welty leading as the Teaching Director. the Lord allowed me the privilege of serving as the Coordinator of the Community Bible Study Columbus Northeast Day Class starting in the spring of 2003 to the spring of 2008. what a blessing to be daily in His Word & serving Him & His women in this way.

& then the Lord did a new thing. He called me away from that. what?!?

He called me back to my church(NAFCON) to be a part of the women's ministry team there. first, as a member of the team & since last fall, i've been the leader. what an awesome privilege it is! & what an awesome responsibility, as well.

i've been reading & praying & looking online & reading & praying for all the help i can get. my team (God's team!) are all very special women. they are so excited about what we get to do & the prayer is that God will be glorified through our women's ministry & all of our efforts.

one of the first things that was implemented last fall was a blog for our women. for this year, we chose a theme to carry us through the year & to unify us as a body of believers: one body, one mind, one purpose. and we're focusing on 12 verses, the "one anothers". you can read all about it on our blog: ICU WOMEN'S MINISTRY

so NOW - i really must go to the conference.

i've already registered & i'm going to the "she leads" sessions. i want to learn everything i possibly can about leading women to the throne of God, equipping them & serving them. and i'm also excited about the opportunity to rub elbows with women who are also serving the Lord in this way.

could i ask you to pray for our team & our ministry? could i ask you to pray for me & my health? i remain cancer free (thank you, Jesus) but i continue with some real issues (thank you, Jesus) that i need some relief from.

and, Lord willing, on july 30, 2010, i'll be in charlotte, n.c. at the She Speaks Conference.

if you're interested in going & could use a scholarship, go here to learn more.
i'm hoping that i win one of the scholarships.

i know this hasn't been my usual blog post. but -
this is my story, this is my song.


blessings & peace -